You can't
make this stuff up.
Head-scratching headlines, spectacularly bad decisions, and the stories that make you ask: seriously?
Latest dispatches
ICE will stop reporting deaths after release, because apparently accountability has a 30-day unsubscribe button
The Guardian reports that ICE rescinded a Biden-era policy requiring reports to Congress and investigations when a detainee dies within 30 days of release.
READ STORY ↗The FTC says real employees will not text badge selfies, because apparently scammers discovered government cosplay
The FTC warned that scammers are pretending to be FTC agents, texting fake employee IDs and claiming they can recover money lost in earlier scams.
READ STORY ↗The FTC says mortgage-relief mailers used CARES Act bait, because apparently foreclosure panic needed junk mail
The FTC says a federal court temporarily halted an alleged mortgage assistance relief operation accused of charging illegal upfront fees and falsely promising lower paym…
READ STORY ↗DOJ sent an observer to LA ballot processing, because apparently counting mail ballots now needs a federal drama lamp
The Guardian reports that DOJ sent a federal prosecutor to observe Los Angeles ballot processing after Trump made baseless claims that California Democrats were rigging …
READ STORY ↗DOJ argued courts cannot stop Trump's White House ballroom, because apparently demolition comes with boss-level immunity
The Guardian reports that a Justice Department lawyer told an appeals court no court has authority to halt construction of Trump's $400 million White House ballroom proj…
READ STORY ↗LA mayoral results briefly put Spencer Pratt near the runoff conversation, because apparently city politics got a reality-TV subplot
AP says Los Angeles Mayor Karen Bass advanced to a November runoff while early returns put Spencer Pratt, a Republican and former reality-TV star, among the candidates c…
READ STORY ↗Hunter Biden went viral on X with posts clarifying that crack cocaine was his drug of choice, not methamphetamine, because sometimes the internet needs pedantic corrections on your own addiction
The presidential pardon artist is now using social media to reclaim his narrative one absurd post at a time, including detailed corrections about his specific drug prefe…
READ STORY ↗House lawmakers drafted an AI bill that freezes state rules, because Congress loves discovering a problem and immediately calling dibs
Reuters and Roll Call report that a bipartisan House AI discussion draft would preempt state laws regulating AI model development for three years.
READ STORY ↗Treasury told banks to watch immigration payroll red flags, because apparently the compliance department needed a passport vibe check
AP and Treasury say FinCEN issued an advisory asking financial institutions to watch for identity theft, payroll fraud and money laundering tied to unauthorized employme…
READ STORY ↗The FTC says a law-firm DEI architect dissolved itself, because apparently hiring rules needed a group project
The FTC says Diversity Lab, the company behind the Mansfield Certification program for law firms, permanently ceased operations after an antitrust inquiry.
READ STORY ↗Alaska has two Republican Dan Sullivans on the Senate ballot, because apparently democracy needed a name-tag problem
AP reports that Sen. Dan Sullivan is facing 15 competitors in Alaska, including another Republican candidate named Dan Sullivan.
READ STORY ↗Republican governors rebranded June with family slogans, because apparently Pride Month needed counterprogramming
AP reports that several Republican governors have proclaimed June as Fidelity Month, Nuclear Family Month or Strong Families Month while avoiding direct answers about wh…
READ STORY ↗The FTC says a mortgage-relief outfit used CARES Act bait, because apparently foreclosure panic needed junk mail cosplay
The FTC says a federal court temporarily halted an allegedly deceptive mortgage-assistance operation that promised lower rates and payments tied to supposed CARES Act re…
READ STORY ↗A judge struck down the 39-country immigration freeze, because apparently lawful applications got sent to the panic drawer
AP reports that a federal judge struck down Trump administration policies that halted final decisions on immigration benefits for people from 39 countries.
READ STORY ↗The FTC says fake parents are targeting childcare providers, because apparently babysitting needed an overpayment trap
The FTC warned childcare providers about scammers posing as parents, sending advance checks for too much money, then asking providers to send the extra cash back.
READ STORY ↗The FTC sent Congress an adoption-intermediary report, because apparently growing a family needed a consumer-protection chaperone
The FTC issued a report to Congress on private-adoption practices, including warning letters to 31 adoption intermediaries over fair advertising and gag-clause concerns.
READ STORY ↗X asked the FTC to loosen Twitter's privacy order, because apparently AI leadership needed fewer old receipts
The FTC is seeking public comment on X Corp.'s petition to set aside or modify the agency's 2022 settlement order concerning Twitter.
READ STORY ↗The Supreme Court let the FCC keep its fine pipeline, because apparently telecom privacy penalties did not need jury duty
The Supreme Court ruled against AT&T and Verizon in a fight over whether the FCC's enforcement and forfeiture process violates the Seventh Amendment.
READ STORY ↗