You can't
make this stuff up.
Head-scratching headlines, spectacularly bad decisions, and the stories that make you ask: seriously?
Latest dispatches
The FTC is sending GOAT customers refunds, because the online sneaker marketplace apparently left shipping and refunds in the same box
The FTC says more than $100,000 is going to consumers who were allegedly misled by GOAT’s shipping, cancellation and refund policies.
READ STORY ↗The FTC reminded 24 healthcare companies to disclose prices, because apparently “how much?” remains a disruptive medical question
The agency warned that incomplete, inaccurate or late pricing information can be deceptive, especially for routine care scheduled in advance.
READ STORY ↗DOJ announced election-crime charges involving 16 noncitizens, because apparently one voting allegation needed a nationwide press release
The Justice Department says the cases involve alleged illegal voting, false claims of U.S. citizenship and fraudulent voter registration across several federal districts.
READ STORY ↗Four people allegedly altered a multinational company’s vendor checks and laundered the money, because apparently accounts payable needed a crime thriller
Federal prosecutors charged four people in an eight-count multistate bank-fraud and money-laundering case involving checks issued to corporate vendors.
READ STORY ↗Trump posted a Republican senator’s supposed phone number during a daylight-saving feud, because apparently time zones now require doxxing
Reuters reports that President Donald Trump shared the purported number online while arguing with Republican Senator Tom Cotton over whether the country should change it…
READ STORY ↗Three people were sentenced after checks stolen from the mail allegedly went shopping through business accounts, because apparently the mailbox needed an accounting department
The DOJ says the defendants admitted intending to cause at least $581,123 in losses by depositing stolen checks into unauthorized business accounts.
READ STORY ↗Tour guides allegedly reused Louvre tickets for different visitors, because apparently the Mona Lisa needed a ticket-sharing economy
AP reports that two Chinese tour guides are accused of fraudulently reusing the same Louvre tickets for multiple tourists, allegedly with help from museum employees.
READ STORY ↗The White House is building an underground visitor screening facility, because apparently visiting the president now requires a bunker appetizer
A federal panel approved the final design for a 33,000-square-foot facility beneath Sherman Park to screen White House visitors, event guests, staff and contractors.
READ STORY ↗A California tech owner allegedly routed $300 million in restricted servers through third countries, because export controls apparently needed a scenic route
The DOJ charged Greg Lui with allegedly buying U.S. servers containing restricted GPUs, sending them through Malaysia and Singapore, and ultimately reshipping them to Ch…
READ STORY ↗A man allegedly used a federal-officer costume to sell a luxury-watch scam, because apparently a Rolex needed a badge
The Manhattan U.S. Attorney’s Office charged John Afriyie with wire fraud, impersonating a federal officer and aggravated identity theft in an alleged scheme involving l…
READ STORY ↗A Massachusetts man pleaded guilty to using government seals in a fraud scheme, because apparently the scam needed an official seal of approval
The Justice Department says Mario Cesar Dos Santos Jr. used FEMA, DHS and FBI seals to portray a private organization as a federal agency and charge people to attend its…
READ STORY ↗The FTC settled with a giant wine distributor over alleged price discrimination, because apparently even booze needed a tiered-membership program
The FTC says Southern Glazer’s Wine and Spirits agreed to protections for small businesses after the agency alleged discriminatory pricing practices.
READ STORY ↗The FTC sued Lens.com over allegedly misleading search-ad prices, because apparently even your eyeballs need to comparison-shop the fine print
The FTC and two states allege Lens.com advertised contact lenses at prices that did not clearly include required fees and recurring charges.
READ STORY ↗Three people were sentenced in a bank-fraud scheme involving fake military IDs, because apparently the checking account needed a uniform
The DOJ says counterfeit Army IDs, passport cards and stolen checks helped drive a multi-state scheme targeting federally insured banks.
READ STORY ↗A website allegedly sold millions of fake postage labels for $2 each, because apparently package weight was just a suggestion
Federal prosecutors charged a Pakistani man in an alleged counterfeit-postage operation that sold more than 5.1 million labels and caused over $126 million in losses.
READ STORY ↗A St. Louis man tried to buy a postal carrier’s truckload of mail and route for $20,000, because apparently the mailbox was not ambitious enough
The DOJ says Ty-Hunter Collins admitted offering a postal carrier $20,000 for the mail in her truck and access to her route.
READ STORY ↗A judge ordered Trump to let CNN, MS NOW and Politico back into the White House, because the press pool needed a judicial hall pass
The three outlets were barred after Trump objected to their coverage, then returned after a federal judge found the access ban could not stand.
READ STORY ↗The government paid for a TV ad that sounds like Trump’s midterm message, because apparently “public service” needed a campaign trailer
AP reports that a U.S.-funded advertisement meshes with Republican campaign messaging and has drawn accusations that government employees may have violated the Hatch Act.
READ STORY ↗